One-way trip to couchville

I went to pick up a bathroom scale at Bed Bath and Beyond today. As I was checking out, the lady asked me “Will you be needing a gift receipt?”

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I narrowly avoided laughing out loud, but only just. Can you imagine the look on your lady’s face when she unwraps that wonderful gift on Christmas morning? Nothing says “I love you” like saying “you need to lose some weight, tubby!”