STOP! Hammer time.

A woman in Utah has been sentenced to 30 days of home confinement.  For what, you ask?  Well, I’m glad you asked.  Because that’s the funny part.

Apparently she blindfolded her husband, and promised him a surprise.  Now, we all know what kind of surprise he was imagining, right?  That’s right.  PIE.  He was clearly expecting some delicious pie.

Instead, what he got was this:  His wife blindfolded him, and then proceeded to bash his head with a hammer.  The man suffered no serious injuries, but apparently not for lack of trying on the wife’s part.  The two were married but separated at the time.

Obviously this woman needs to hit the gym more.  I mean, she got a free shot on an unsuspecting and defenseless man and did no serious damage?  Really?  Was she using a Nerf hammer?  Or one of those toy hammers that squeak when you hit something with them?  Unless her husband has an adamantium skull, I’d expect more than “minor injuries” from an attack like that.  And if he does have an adamantium skull, well, shit.  That’s pretty hardcore.  But I suspect she just needed to use the right tool for the job.